Tricycles in Arlington?! WTF

This headline from the DCist takes the words clean out of my mouth: My God, Arlington, What Have You Done?

Tricycle? Tricycles? What, pray tell, is the problem that tricycles solve, Arlington County? Two wheels on a bike aren’t redundant enough? Can’t feel the wind in your hair on a Segway? Bethesda nab all the pogo sticks? I’d like to tell you that no one is judging you. You county employees who have registered in this trike share program are cutting down on emissions and proving that the suburbs can develop sufficiently dense commercial/residential corridors where you don’t need a car to survive. But I would ultimately be lying to you. If you are an adult riding a tricycle, it is the privilege — no, the obligation — of every one of your fellow human beings to point and snicker. Snidely, and with abandon. I urge you to save the planet and your dignity. Barring that, please promise that you will never, ever attempt to ride a tricycle in the District. The kids here greet adults riding bicycles by throwing rocks at them. There is no telling what they would do to a grownup on a trike.

I read this, and I hear KC’s sarcasm in my head, I hear HS saying, “Mollytics – Alexandria isn’t the deep south!,” and I see my NOVA-hating friends nodding in agreement.

To read more about this economically-friendly-but-terribly-embarrassing tricycles – TRICYLCES! – read the full article from The Washington Post.

Seriously folks. This is why NOVA is so lame, I’m sorry.

3 thoughts on “Tricycles in Arlington?! WTF

  1. If HC gets a tricycle, G-d help me!

    This trike thing is sorta like the skipper lady. It’s something that might have seemed good – even whimsical and funny – on paper, but in practice is really just another way for the tragically awkward to be ridiculed by the other somewhat-less tragically awkward in an effort to feel better about ourselves. So maybe we should just say Thanks! to these triking fools. Because I know I feel slightly better about myself now.

  2. Pingback: NOVA v. Maryland | Mollytics!

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